What's the biggest thing you ever got away with?

Discussion in 'General Discussion Forum' started by Mutant Screg, Apr 18, 2017.

  1. Mutant Screg

    Mutant Screg Totally not a mutant

    Jun 27, 2015
    I was (and still am) a pretty lax guy, so the only thing I can think of doing is pretty tame compared to some things. I was staying with a friend and his family in Albuquerque. Anyway we went to Jack in the Box and bought like three bags full of tacos. Since I hadn't had Jack in years, I went total ham and ate at least 10 of those fucks. I don't know if it was the tacos or it happened just by a random stroke of misfortune, but that night I took one of the most gut wrenching, anus pounding, filthiest shits I've ever dropped. Once done, I felt like I had lost 20 pounds. Glad to be done with that mess, I got up, flushed, and went to bed thinking nothing of it. It turns out that the toilet had clogged and since I hadn't checked, it flooded unchecked for the entire night. Even worse, people upstairs had taken showers since then, causing that water to flood from the toilet as well. We were awoken by my friend's sister who had stepped in the mess, which had by then spread through a decent chunk of the house by the stairs. Water-logged turds littered the ground. She ran upstairs and got the adults to stop showering, getting them downstairs and telling them what happened. They were flipping out, and I knew I was in deep shit. I tried to sound surprised, and apparently I was a pretty good actor because no one suspected me and instead put it on my friend's uncle, who I guess was infamous for that sort of stuff at prior family gatherings. To this day only I know the truth.
     
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  2. MutantScalper

    MutantScalper Dozy northern git

    Nov 22, 2009
    Crimes. I won't go into details. :D They never caught me.

    Edit. Nothing major. Stay on the straight and narrow, kids. Crime don't pay etc.
     
    • [Like] [Like] x 1
  3. YeeCop

    YeeCop If It's Hostile, You Kill It

    Jan 26, 2017
    One time my friends and I went to a Jack in the Box at 4am. We were spending the night at a friend's house, gaming and chilling into the wee hours of the night, when we got the munchies.
    Since none of us could drive at the time, we tried dining in/taking our food to-go and walk back to our friend's house. The dining area for Jack's was closed though, however the drive-thru was open 24/7. We saw a janitor inside motion towards the drive-thru so we thought, "Maybe they'll take our order at the drive-thru window."

    They take our order at the intercom just fine, assuming we were in a car. When we get to the drive-thru window, the cooks/cashiers were agape. Here are three teenagers walking up to a drive-thru window in the dead of the night.
    This tall-ass worker with this man-bun was like:

    They ended up serving us anyways, albeit we were given a warning to order in the dining area next time (but it was closed, dafuq??)
     
  4. PlanHex

    PlanHex Useless layabout oTO Moderator Orderite

    Nov 4, 2007
    Boy, these spambots sure are getting good, both making up elaborate stories to advertise Jack-in-the-Box.
     
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  5. YeeCop

    YeeCop If It's Hostile, You Kill It

    Jan 26, 2017
    Nah, the weirdest shit happens around Jack in the Boxes, funny enough.
     
  6. PlanHex

    PlanHex Useless layabout oTO Moderator Orderite

    Nov 4, 2007
    In the case of the OP, literally the weirdest shit.
     
    • [Like] [Like] x 3
  7. erich van loon

    erich van loon Polish Winged Hussar

    May 23, 2016
    It won't seem like much, but I'm surprised I got away with it.

    In the beginning of the 7th grade for me, we had some math packet to do for homework. Someone joked about doing the whole thing on a calculator, and well, I actually did the whole thing on calculator and did only one page of work.

    My math teacher at the time had an...incredible rage (basically.) She was nice from time to time, but mostly mean.

    So I hand in the homework, she asked me,

    "Where's the work." And then I replied,

    "I left it at home."

    The next week I was sick and managed to stay home the entire week.

    The teacher forgot about it, and I was safe.
     
  8. GonZo_626

    GonZo_626 Well Shit!

    Jul 29, 2016
    I'm just gonna go with @MutantScalper here and say crime does not pay.
     
  9. Juza The Cloud

    Juza The Cloud Nanto Goshasei

    Jun 3, 2015
    I stole Raoh's horse for a while
     
  10. naossano

    naossano Vault Fossil

    Oct 19, 2006
    Not a huge offense, (legally speaking) but quite a funny story.

    I don't know equivalent in international school system, but at some point where i was quite young (around 10-15), we had our first computer class. It was around 1998-2002 and almost nobody beside me and a couple of friends got prior experience with computers. The work was way too easy for my friends and myself and we were busy chatting most of the time, pointing out how easy it was. Some other people were a bit pissed at that and started to be a bit more challenging, saying that they will rule the class and that we wouldn't get any points as we were chatting (some more details are lost in time). At some point, after several warnings, we decided *screw with it*, and erased their work from distance (they kept saying that we wouldn't be able to do it). Then, we had fun with it, and erased the work from almost everyone at some point of another of the year.

    Come the end of the year, when the teacher give our average points for the year. Almost everyone get poor rate. Except my friends and myself, we get huge rate, but right when giving use those point the teacher feels obliged to say *... But you have no honor...* The mean son of a b**** knew the whole time, but did nothing and even shrugged off those who told him, but still gave us the score, and made a point on making us know that he knew.
     
    Last edited: May 20, 2017
  11. Millim

    Millim What the fuck is this for a shit?!

    Oct 13, 2010
    So, probably not the biggest thing here or even the biggest thing I had done, but it was certainly the most memorable.

    When I was in year 10 (or 11), our Science Class was failing miserably. So in order to get better grades, our Head Teacher came in to teach us once or twice a week. The teacher stuck me at the front right in front of the Head teacher.
    (For the record, he was an odd fella, he wouldn't come across as very insane, but some of his ideas for the School were, needless to say looking back, it appears he was a nice enough guy who was just experiencing his first school as a Head, plus at that point, he had only been there for about a year or two).

    Anyway, I'm getting off track. So me being me, I would just pop my bag on the table, put my head onto my bag and sleep... every lesson.
    My actual Science Teacher found out, but didn't really say anything, she was just amazed at how I could get away with it week after week.

    Still, never got caught out by my Head.
     
  12. MutantScalper

    MutantScalper Dozy northern git

    Nov 22, 2009
    But he saw you doing it? Then he did catch you, but allowed it.
     
  13. Millim

    Millim What the fuck is this for a shit?!

    Oct 13, 2010
    No he never saw me (my other teacher did).
    If he did, then I guess he didn't really care.
     
  14. Walpknut

    Walpknut Background Radiant

    Dec 30, 2010
    I snuck in an assignment I actually got too late to class to turn in once. It wasn't even a big assignment so not much big effect.
    I also asked a dentist to give me a signed medical license for not assisting to a class when I had a presentation to make, but I was in the last week of the trimester and every teacher was demanding shit for the same day. So fuck them, really.
     
  15. Supreme Shah Ismail

    Supreme Shah Ismail Still Mildly Glowing

    Sep 17, 2016
    Prom with my friends yelling "allahu akbar" as loud as humanly possible in a neighborhood at 3 AM.
     
  16. erich van loon

    erich van loon Polish Winged Hussar

    May 23, 2016
    you should've yelled "PRAISE AHURA MAZDA"
     
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  17. FalloutIsMyDrug

    FalloutIsMyDrug Former Fo3 Lover(converted)

    Sep 29, 2016
    Mine would have to be talking shit about Fallout 2 and not getting flamed/banned.
     
  18. Buxbaum666

    Buxbaum666 Heterostructured Nanorod oTO Orderite

    Dec 5, 2003
    Why/how? Are toilets just automatically flushing at all times where you live? The toilets I know won't flood the bathroom unless you keep flushing.
     
  19. Mutant Screg

    Mutant Screg Totally not a mutant

    Jun 27, 2015
    People upstairs going to the bathroom overnight, I would guess. Water had nowhere to go and so just roiled up out of the downstairs' john