Proof that there is a God

Discussion in 'General Discussion Forum' started by Zaij, Apr 25, 2006.

  1. Zaij

    Zaij Vault Senior Citizen
    Orderite

    Feb 10, 2004
    Seems fairly straight forward to me. There is a God and he doesn't like children. Can't see any other possibilities.

    http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/12467604/?GT1=7938
     
  2. Roshambo

    Roshambo Antediluvian as Feck

    Apr 3, 2003
    There is a God, and he has one WICKED sense of ironic humor.

    Irony! Get it?! :D
     
  3. Malky

    Malky Lived Through the Heat Death
    Orderite

    May 7, 2003
    HA! Good one.
     
  4. Bradylama

    Bradylama So Old I'm Losing Radiation Signs

    Oct 22, 2003
    Couldn't they have been praying for sweet death?
     
  5. shmee

    shmee First time out of the vault

    14
    Apr 22, 2006
    or to be famous?
     
  6. Wooz

    Wooz Vault Sweeper Admin Orderite Board Cop oTO

    May 18, 2003
    Misfits!
     
  7. The Vault Dweller

    The Vault Dweller always looking for water.

    Aug 24, 2004
    Maybe He just wanted the children to come visit him?

    Whom am I kidding that just sucks...

    Sincerely,
    The Vault Dweller
     
  8. Montez

    Montez So Old I'm Losing Radiation Signs

    Jun 20, 2003
    The joke is on us! But then, what else would we expect from God? The depth and level of His irony is to normal comedians as the universe is to a grain of sand. And here I am stealing material from chumps like David Cross and Larry David when I should be taking my cues from The Ultimate Comedian. Forgive me my ignorance, oh lord! For years I sought laughter amongst the heathens, but my eyes have been opened to thy unimitable and omnipotent comedy stylings! Now I understand - when there was one set of footprints in the sand, that was when you were at open mic night.
     
  9. Pajari

    Pajari Look, Ma! Two Heads!

    314
    Jun 7, 2005
    Actually, noted philosophical badass G.K. Chesterton believed the one important characteristic of God that's never described in the Bible is his mirth.
     
  10. Lazarus Plus

    Lazarus Plus The smoovest

    679
    Apr 1, 2005
    Oh five Mexican children we hardly knew ye. Ya dead bastards!

    What can I say, man? God is a kid with an ant farm and a magnifying glass.
     
  11. Shadowbird

    Shadowbird Where'd That 6th Toe Come From?

    442
    Jul 20, 2003
    Just goes to show that one should not pray to/at/with some man-made crap. I don't see God's irony/attitude/anything, I see people brainwashed into believing a (dangerous) piece of metal will somehow magnify their prayers, which are all going inwards anyway ('cause that's where the God is).
     
  12. Jebus

    Jebus Background Radiant
    Orderite

    Jan 29, 2004
    There is a God and he doesn't like Mexicans.


    It'd make sense, since all humans are created in his image 'n such.

    (N.B. Mexicans can barely be considered human)
     
  13. Roshambo

    Roshambo Antediluvian as Feck

    Apr 3, 2003
    Well, as I walked smiling in front of a giant cross atop of a nearby church earlier today, I turned slightly and waved cheerfully at God.

    Apparently, he doesn't mind that I find his little joke amusing. In fact, this is his favorite way to take the young aside from child abductors.

    Really, can you say "Mexican stir-fry"? I wonder just how tasteless that joke can get, because I bet you could taste it in the air... :twisted:
     
  14. Sina

    Sina It Wandered In From the Wastes

    144
    Aug 3, 2005
    Well i hope that anyone here that thinks its funny gets his kids killed one day by some similar accident, because only then you would know how funny it really is.

    Dont get me wrong, when i watched Schindlers list i almost got kidney disfunction from laughing all the time...there is that effect of your brain connecting only to that media side of it, that presentation and symbolism and visual impact or imagined visual of a situation...and finding it hilarious.

    Unfortunately my brain works backwards, i think first on those kids, then at this forced imagery and fake stories of some "God" that looks like a bearded wise guy. Which nobody believes in anyway.

    I only hope nobody of theirs does not find this thread ever.

    There is that difference you know.
     
  15. Zaij

    Zaij Vault Senior Citizen
    Orderite

    Feb 10, 2004
  16. Montez

    Montez So Old I'm Losing Radiation Signs

    Jun 20, 2003
    I can only hope that my kids, my friends and family, or anyone else dies in some sort of "cosmic joke" type of way like this rather than some completely senseless and horrible way like cancer, disease, drunk driving accidents, or murder. At least something like this is "positive" in that it deepens our thinking about life and adds an element of humor and the mysterious, instead of the completely "negative" feelings that most deaths bring, like little kids being caught in the crossfire of scumbag gangsters or women in Rwanda being raped and mutilated to death.

    I'm an agnostic, borderline atheiest. If I had a choice, I'd much rather die being struck by a bolt of lightning while blaspheming than be killed by a drunk driver or by being stabbed during a mugging. I'd rather have my death or anyone else's inspire some laughter and wonder in the universe along with the sense of loss than only inspire feelings of anger and impotence and thoughts that we live in a horrible world devoid of any meaning except base human need, idiocy and evil.
     
  17. Dapper Dan Man

    Dapper Dan Man Water Chip? Been There, Done That
    Orderite

    919
    Oct 6, 2004
    I'd rather die in a way where my bowels don't loosen into 'mud ass'?
     
  18. Montez

    Montez So Old I'm Losing Radiation Signs

    Jun 20, 2003
    Amen to that!
     
  19. Jebus

    Jebus Background Radiant
    Orderite

    Jan 29, 2004
    I'd prefer a way in which pieces of my body get strewn onto innocent bystanders, mentally scarring them for life.

    Maybe I should become a suicide bomber or something.
     
  20. Wooz

    Wooz Vault Sweeper Admin Orderite Board Cop oTO

    May 18, 2003
    Or just get drunk and pass out behind a telephone booth.