No Mutants Allowed Let's Play: Wasteland

Discussion in 'Wasteland Discussion' started by Tagaziel, Mar 26, 2012.

  1. Tagaziel

    Tagaziel Panzerkatze Orderite

    Dec 10, 2003
    <center>Update 5: Rats in the Bar</center>

    Scott's Bar is the hub in Quartz, a reinforced safe haven for everyone (though with a bad case of the Uglies). Everyone's welcome here, provided they don't shoot the Bartender or his staff. The squad lost its leader and it's time to regroup and think over the next step in their campaign to uncover disturbances in the desert...

    The Rangers quickly familiarize themselves with the interior of the Bar.

    „I've noticed smoke rising over the town. We need to gather intel. Bison, you're on a short leash. Bolts... Bolts, where the hell are you?”

    Bolts has bolted!

    „He wandered off towards the stage. And the dancers.”

    „Hellooo there ladies!”


    Welcome to the most annoying mode of fighting in Wasteland: with TWO separate parties. This is a very unwieldy method, as before each turn this neat screen is displayed. Simply terrific.

    Thankfully, Bolts is pretty handy with a crowbar in a pinch. Even against bouncers that resemble mountains of flesh.

    Must be a steady diet of bad jokes and lame puns.

    „Never bring a chain to a CrowBar fight!”

    Bolts, please...

    „First impression's a bitch to make, Bolts. Get off the stage. Now.
    „OK, just let me check the--


    Bolts is stuck up there until he's able to entertain the crowds.

    „We are taking a seat. Have fun, Bolts.”


    The character is effectively stuck on stage, unless he is able to entertain the public. Bolts decides that because he doesn't really do acrobatics or similiar stuff, he is going to try and use his wit to impress the crowds.

    Which promptly doesn't work and Bolts receives a bottle to the noggin.

    „This might take a while Bison, fetch firewater.”




    Bison goes over to the bar, but given his frame, shoves a few punks accidentaly.

    Not one to take pushes, he shoves back.

    The end result is easy to foresee: Bison carved the entire group of six Ugly gangmen into small kibbles with his trusty combat knife. This is also a blessing, as the cash they drop goes a long way into providing some money to buy firewater for the commander (as I forgot to divide cash and Bolts lies unconscious on the stage with all our monies).

    „What'll it be?”


    We'll go through the options from top to bottom.

    Plain sludge and fine sludge!



    After exhausting the list of possibilities, Bison's brain cogs turn and he decides to pick up some juicy intel by the way.

    „Info costs too.”

    „What's with the dancers?”


    „Ugly has three toughs who keep the combination to his vault. They are triplets. „


    „The answer to the last riddle is on the far northeast tabletop. „


    „You can buy ammo at the store on the corner of Moon Rd. & Loop Dr.”

    „Any dirt on us, Rangers?”

    „A guy named Ace is looking for a few good fighters to go back to Vegas with him. Something nasty is going on there.”

    Bison's brain slowly processes this information and ultimately, he decides to make a mental note of this.

    „Any idle chat?”

    Bison decides to leave.

    Satisfied and with some firewater to spare, Bison returns to Czaress. As he makes his way through the Bar, he notices a pretty barmaid passing by. Intriguing.

    „Firewater. Good. Any intel?”
    „Uh, I... Kind of killed some one. Six of them.”

    „Leave you alone for five min--”

    „No, wait. They were thugs from some sort of gang in the area. The leader's named Ugly. There's also something about riddles and a guy named Ace looking for Rangers to aid Vegas.”

    „There may be hope for you yet. Let's check on Bolts, maybe he's back among the suffering.”

    He is. And he's still stuck. To get loose, he needs to impress them with IQ, Agility, Charisma, Acrobat, Confidence, Sleight of Hand or Knife Throw. All of which are, uh, problematic. He gets knocked out repeatedly.

    On fail: Reduce Current Con by 2d6
    Intelligence (25)
    Agility (25)
    Charisma (25)
    Acrobat (20, Level 1)
    Confidence (20, Level 1)
    Knife Throw (20, Level 1)
    Sleight of Hand (20, Level 1) [/spoiler:b2b9115533]


    Czaress goes in, but the stage is blocked off to keep the character up there. So, I guess it's rotten fruit for Bolts until he manages to say something witty that isn't a terribly lame pun.

    Czaress and Bison instead wander over to the jukebox. And they're harassed by punks.

    The conflict is quickly resolved by Bison's skill with a knife (and some gunnery support from the others; that guy scares me).

    A clue!


    Finally, after several hours of trying and getting pelped with rotten fruit and bottles for failing miserably, Bolts is finally able to amuse the crowds and get off the stage.


    „After spending three hours pelted with rotten fruit, bottles and something I'd rather not identify I think I'm going to work on my puns.”

    „Moxie's good with 'em”


    „I swear I'll interrogate that lizard one of these days... We're getting you washed, Bolts, you reek.”

    On our way to the bathrooms we locate the HEAD CRUSHER!

    We show him the card and...

    „Thank you. Go to the Atchison's tent and tell them CATERPILLAR.”


    Or keywords, rather.

    „Care to CHAT?”

    „You like the Mutie Cuties? One of them is a terrible flirt. She gets people in trouble.”

    „That DANCER?”

    „Seen the dancer yet? You don't think I look mutant, do you?”

    „No, not as far as I can tell, Mr Head Crusher Man Sir. THANKS for your time”

    „Goodbye, and thanks to you too!”

    Scott's Bar hides a few more surprises too, but we'll hold off activating them until we get the squad back up to speed with a new recruit. Scott's tip about a man called Ace looking for Rangers is a pointer in the right direction, but I feel we ought to be prepared properly for that.

    „Moxie suggests we pick up fresh me-- a Ranger to fill in the vacancy.”

    „Since we've cut and shot people here, blasted the jukebox crew and chased off the dancers... I think we should take the back door... After I wash these danged fruits off of me.”

    „Sound ideas, both of you. Yes, even you Bison.”



    We go into the toilets...


    „Bad idea. Bison, if you would.”

    It wasn't a bright idea to draw a gun on the Rangers. Much less Rangers with Bison in their team. His knife works fast, but not very... cleanly.

    „I'm pretty sure he's dead, Big B. Missing a lung and heart goes a long way towards that.”

    „You take away the fun from being me.”

    „You're scaring the other guy, Bison. Now, boy, we mean you no harm (with the possible exception of the guy carving his name into the corpse), can you tell us anything about UGLY or his GANG?”

    :tired: „That leather-wrapped monosynaptic bully! He tried to pick up my sister Laurie!”

    :tired: „These freaks are all over Quartz. Lots of them are at the Courthouse, and more on Devastation Row.”

    „I heard you guys had a MAYOR here. Know anything 'bout him?”

    :tired: „Everyone in town knows where they are keeping the mayor. The courthouse is on Quail Trail.”

    „We heard something about a RIDDLER and his RIDDLES (Bison, leave the eyes alone)”

    :tired: „That old coot sure has weird riddles! Laurie copied one right answer on one of the tabletops.”

    „THANKS for your help, now get out of here, before another guy shows up.”

    Plot exposition is buried deep in the game and you have to actively work to get it. That's one of the reasons Wasteland is so loved, moreso due to them being little more than pointers, exposition and bits that are tied together by the player to form their own tapestry of a story.

    Woot, poetic.

    „Orders, Boss-woman?”

    „First, this is the last time you call me that. Second, get Bison washed. Third, seems Quartz can't solve its bandit problem without us. We need to pick up another Ranger before we tackle this and figure out why that Ace needs us.”

    We're putting off Quartz until we manage to get some experience, another Ranger and I'm confident Bison won't kill another one again.

    Hey, what's in the ladies' toilet?

    Not quite sure how she can identify Czaress as a female underneath all that camo clothing, but w/e.

    „Wait for me. Bison, sit. Good boy. Moxie, watch him.”

    Czaress might resemble a walking pile of camo rags, but underneath it all sits... something..

    :puppy-dog: „Everyone is worried about Mayor Pedros but others are held hostage too. Felicia Pedros, his wife, is our friend. We think she has been moved to the outlaw hideout. We hope you will try to rescue her. And remember what Ellen said when you go to the Stagecoach Inn."

    They smile and leave.


    Now, time to blow this join. RAT5 tries to leave by the way of the backdoor, but...

    They don't like us. We back off and leave by the front door, hassled only by a few random thugs. Guess mopping the floor with Uglies scares the lesser fish off.

    „Bison, I am going to be frank. You fucked up. Now you'll be atoning.”


    „We go in, and you atone by carving up everything that raises a finger. Understand?”



    And so, we go in.

    The battle is quick with Bison going berserk on the enemy. Trouble is, they see it too, so we chase them down the corridor, shooting their watchman on the way.

    And eventually we gun the last player in the bar.

    This also demonstrates, how melee is better: doubles the experience gained. Guns are still useful, but in the early levels, it's better to stick by your guns and slaughter everything using blunt and sharp objects alternatively.

    „Good Bison. Let's bug out before anyone comes asking, why we gunned down a perfectly legitimate card game.”

    „They had a rifle. And cash. And pistols. ”

    „Justified by me.”

    Fun fact: The game's drops are randomized, so we actually didn't get a rifle. C'est la vie.

    Czaress leads the entire team back to the Ranger Center, to get a replacement Ranger. And there...

    „You useless, incompetent, deadbeat waste of human flesh. Explain to me again, why was Lieutenant Alexander Neftzovich killed in action? And why was he assigned to your worthless excuse for a Ranger outfit?”

    „Y'see, it's kind of hard to explain... There were these, uh, mutant k-- killing machines and the Red R-- Roachman and, err...”

    „Commander Optimalus fell in battle with desert raiders right outside Highpool... The same raiders that burned it. We barely escaped with our lives.”

    „You and your damn luck...”

    „I knifed Luk a long time ago, Chief.”

    „And you have this guy with you too... Jesus, Mary and Joseph, what did I do in my previous life to land here, with you... ”

    „Officer, we'll go away. Just give us a replacement.”

    „Against my better judgement... Regulations obligate me to give you someone. *sigh* Take Flynn, fresh Ranger, old tyme brawler and gentleman. Maybe he'll civilize you lot. And get out of my sight, we're too busy going through Highpool's casualties and trying to keep Rangers who had children there from going berserk. Better yet, go kiss a Shadowclaw's arse, so that I can get some peace.”

    And so, we meet the newest addition to our team, Ranger Alfred Flynn, gentleman, brawler, swashbuckler extraordinare!

    „Welcome, and good day to you. You are Miss... erm, Czaress, I presume?”

    „And you are Flynn, I assume?”

    „Lordie, he looks so clean and... Do I smell soap?”

    „Right you are, my friend. I took the last available occassion to take a thorough bath and scrubbing. And judging by the look of your compatriot, I will certainly not stay that way for long.”

    „How are you going to fight, if you're so clean? Beating heavy business.”

    „Simple, I will keep bashing, crushing and grinding them until they resemble thick red paste with the occassional spot of shattered bone and artistically arranged bowels.”

    „Urkh. Stop feeding my imagination.”

    „Good Flynn. Good to have someone who isn't a berserker, merely an artiste, in crushing our enemies. ”

    „My pleasure.”

    Restocked with <s>cannon fodder</s> a new Ranger, we are going over to the Ag. Center.

    There we are met with a... peculiar welcome...

    <center>To Be Continued...</center>
  2. Tagaziel

    Tagaziel Panzerkatze Orderite

    Dec 10, 2003
    Apologies for the distance between updates, life is merkwurdig.

    Two references to popular culture exist in my writing and media above. GOTTA CATCH 'EM ALL.
  3. TorontoReign

    TorontoReign ⛧卐⛧ Staff Member Moderator [REDACTED]

    Apr 1, 2005

    No apologies are required. You are doing this community a fine service. I think I love you . :)
  4. Stanislao Moulinsky

    Stanislao Moulinsky Vault Fossil

    Jul 16, 2009
    Wow, things like the punks shoving your character are randomized or scripted? :o
  5. Per

    Per Vault Consort Staff Member Admin

    Apr 1, 2004
    Kind of scripted. The game map is composed of tiles which can do things like print messages or demand skill checks or spawn loot or start a dialogue and then conditionally switch to new tiles that do other things and so on. Really quite ingenious.
  6. kgreene

    kgreene First time out of the vault

    Jan 30, 2006
    funny, I had forgotten about being forced to perform if you go up there. Good progress, it may not be as fast as you want but it's a lot faster than I am progressing :/

    ha, bolts isn't much of a showman. Fun puzzle though.

    Looking forward to agricultural center.
  7. memetics

    memetics ☢ Mysterious Stranger ☢

    Jan 2, 2009
    Nice job so far, Tag, and enjoyable storytelling.

    Would be fun to see another update someday, though. :-) (Tag's update speed of late reminds me of our favorite Fallout 2 RP developer's update speed... ;-) )

  8. mobucks

    mobucks jetski Orderite

    May 22, 2010
    This was a great way to spend my sunday morning.
  9. Carib FMJ

    Carib FMJ Nuka-Cola Chaser

    Nov 8, 2003
    Playing Wasteland 2 Directors Cut; I got a question - has anyone noticed that when you dismiss your team mates they don't go back to the Ranger Center mess hall.

    Or did I do something wrong? I made sure I recruited them.
  10. sea

    sea Vault Senior Citizen

    Oct 5, 2009
    Known bug, I believe it's been fixed internally by now, should be in the next patch. Sorry for the inconvenience!
  11. Carib FMJ

    Carib FMJ Nuka-Cola Chaser

    Nov 8, 2003
    Good knowledge. I think I will wait for the patch. Right now waiting for one of characters to turn into a Pod Person.