Thread to report tricorder malfunctions.

Discussion in 'General Discussion Forum' started by Mr. Grandma, Feb 18, 2020.

  1. Mr. Grandma

    Mr. Grandma C3H5N3O9 + NaOH Orderite

    Nov 3, 2007
    I would like to report a tricorder malfunction that has caused a reverse polarity phase shift in engineering.

    The CWO has failed to report in and my replicator has been spraying pickle juice all over my equipment.
     
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  2. TorontoReign

    TorontoReign BLUE BLUE BLUE Staff Member Moderator

    Apr 1, 2005
    We entered a super dense Quaffer Field a few hours ago, which has been known to interfere with certain sensor readings. Flaws in the tritium microreplication system might be the problem as far as the pickle juice goes. I suggest you report to Sick Bay for nerve stapling just to be safe.
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2020
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  3. Mr. Grandma

    Mr. Grandma C3H5N3O9 + NaOH Orderite

    Nov 3, 2007
    IVE ALREADY BEEN STAPLED 3 TIMES THIS AFTERNOON I AM IN AGREEMENT INSIDE THE PRIME FUNCTION.
     
  4. TorontoReign

    TorontoReign BLUE BLUE BLUE Staff Member Moderator

    Apr 1, 2005
    Ensign, sedate this man at once.

    I'm sorry sir! Nothing is working! His DNA has been altered somehow.
     
  5. TheGM

    TheGM The voice of reason

    Aug 19, 2008
    Hmmmmm....Maybe if he we bombard him with Dorsophin Particles while recalibrating his intrinsic field we could an induce a kletomatic reversal!
     
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  6. Hassknecht

    Hassknecht For hate's sake. Staff Member Admin Orderite

    Aug 16, 2010
    Shut up, Wesley.
     
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  7. Mr. Grandma

    Mr. Grandma C3H5N3O9 + NaOH Orderite

    Nov 3, 2007
    CELLULAR PEPTIDES FOR MY RUTABAGAS
     
  8. TorontoReign

    TorontoReign BLUE BLUE BLUE Staff Member Moderator

    Apr 1, 2005
    This is now a Star Trek thread. It has spread.




    It's like people forget all the episodes where they traded with alien cultures. Or industrial replicators. Or like building them from scratch by reverse engineering alien stuff. This has been discussed a lot (Hassknecht mentioned it) but it really only needed a throw away line about specifics with the process.
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2020
  9. TheGM

    TheGM The voice of reason

    Aug 19, 2008
    That is asking to much of the Voyager writers. they couldn't even keep track of the stuff they wrote let alone what the other writing teams wrote since all three of them had their own idea of that the show was. that's why all the ancillary crew members just straight up disappear at one point. since they forgot they existed or thought they killed people off when they didn't.
     
    Last edited: Feb 19, 2020
  10. TorontoReign

    TorontoReign BLUE BLUE BLUE Staff Member Moderator

    Apr 1, 2005
    Ancillary crew disappeared on TNG all the time, but I do agree. This shit early on with Kes and Neelix is just annoying as fuck. It was annoying back then and it is annoying now. So much so that when she left the show Neelix didn't even see her off the ship.
     
  11. Hassknecht

    Hassknecht For hate's sake. Staff Member Admin Orderite

    Aug 16, 2010
    They also aired stuff out of order or straight up messed up their own timelines (not literally the janeway, but talking about the Delta Flyer before it was built and so on).
    Voyager certainly had a lot of problems, but I still have a soft spot for it in my heart. It showed great promise, and there were some great episodes. "Mortal Coil" was a great episode, it was Voyager's "Hard Time". Also a great episode. And "Course Oblivion", "Memorial", "Night"... It also had some fun Doctor/Seven episodes. Sadly, a lot of the potential was wasted. The setting in the Gamma quadrant could have been used much better, especially in terms of ship deterioration and change. They do mention it from time to time, but outside Neelix' kitchen and the astrometrics lab there isn't much visual change. While the Enterprise under Kirk was also away for a five-year mission, and Voyager wasn't gone much longer, but Voyager certainly went through harder times.
    Oh well.
    Enterprise (the show) also had some great prospect, but fell flat.
    TNG and DS9 still hold up as the best shows.
     
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  12. TorontoReign

    TorontoReign BLUE BLUE BLUE Staff Member Moderator

    Apr 1, 2005
    My favorite part is all the trading they have to do to get along. It really was a missed opportunity for them to say something about the torpedoes during one of those segments, but I will analyze the entire show to make sure something wasn't hinted at. The shuttles I rationalized since I'm pretty sure if I was in Engineering I could build a shuttle from scratch with all the tech they have access to. (assuming I was a spaceman)

    "These Kazon torpedoes can be retrofitted for our ship Captain."
    "It's going to be hard finding a suitable energy source out here to power this shuttle but I think we can do it."
     
  13. TheGM

    TheGM The voice of reason

    Aug 19, 2008
    Couple things hurt Enterprise. that crap Temporal Coldwar nonsense which was some dumb ass mandate by the Network to have to be the show's main story and by the time they dropped it that damage was done. Archer also had the same problem Janeway had that different writing teams wanted him to either be a scientist out splorin' the universe or some kind of bad ass diplomat man-guy. they also did a number on that Vulcan chick by having her get mind raped every 4 episodes and even getting a mind std because of it.
    It was pretty egregious on Voyager though, like that little kid that hangs out with Neelix who had her mom disappear because the writers forgot about her completely.
     
  14. Hassknecht

    Hassknecht For hate's sake. Staff Member Admin Orderite

    Aug 16, 2010
    Voyager also had the hydroponics garden (which somehow was just a regular garden without actual hydroponics), but it was mostly relegated to providing flowers and shit. They could have done some awesome Firefly-like episodes where they'd just be scrounging by, and sometimes even be forced to not be as shiny as Starfleet would like them to be.
    I mean, Janeway was a psychopath, but at least they could have made that a development out of harsh survival, and not just because writers didn't know what to do with her and what the other writers did.

    /edit:
    My favourite Archer moment.
     
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  15. Verevoof

    Verevoof Cryptid oTO Moderator Orderite

    Jul 12, 2009
     
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  16. TorontoReign

    TorontoReign BLUE BLUE BLUE Staff Member Moderator

    Apr 1, 2005
    I didn't know about the kid. She is annoying as fuck though. I recall when that first person got knocked up and they debated the prospects of long term travel through the quadrant.
     
  17. Gizmojunk

    Gizmojunk Half-way Through My Half-life

    Nov 26, 2007
    They did the same with "Trip" Tucker, only he got pregnant, and it was the origin story of the Holodeck.
     
  18. Hassknecht

    Hassknecht For hate's sake. Staff Member Admin Orderite

    Aug 16, 2010
    I like that in every show since TNG they had to shoehorn in a chick in tight, non-regulation jumpsuits.
    Wait, no, they didn't do that in DS9, did they? I guess that's why DS9 is so underrated. Kira Nerys was an attempt, but no comparison to the likes of Troi, Seven, and T'Pol.
    (They didn't need to shoehorn in any chick like that in TOS because all women already wore skirts short enough to warrant a Fatwa. Quoth Jadzia in that awesome "Trials and Tribbleations" episode: "... and women wore less")
     
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  19. TorontoReign

    TorontoReign BLUE BLUE BLUE Staff Member Moderator

    Apr 1, 2005
    Dax was the closest we got in DS9.

     
  20. Hassknecht

    Hassknecht For hate's sake. Staff Member Admin Orderite

    Aug 16, 2010
    But that's just a normal uniform. Kira at least had a non-Starfleet uniform.
    The biggest sin of STD is not bringing back this style:

    It's honestly a small wonder that I still do not own any Star Trek costume/uniform.